Bratislava – Bratislava Transport Museum (Skoda Octavia)

This charming red contraption is a Škoda Octavia which has Bluetooth and crumple zones, and it’s not to be confused with the modern Škoda Octavia, which has Bluetooth and crumple zones, this version has neither, but it does have style, presence and just enough horsepower to make it to the end of your street if the wind is kind. Manufactured from 1959 until 1971, this was Škoda’s eighth post-war model, hence the name ‘Octavia’ which they presumably thought sounded rather decadent. And in fairness, for something made in a command economy, it’s rather swish.

Power came from a 1.1 or 1.2 litre engine that produced around 40 horsepower, although that’s ‘horsepower’ in the same loose way that instant coffee is ‘coffee.’ It would get up to about 110 km/h if you were being brave, had a clear road, and said your goodbyes before setting off. The rear-wheel drive setup meant that in the right conditions, by which I primarily mean snow, you could probably get a bit of sideways action, or at least an elegant pirouette into a ditch.

This particular example is in glorious postbox red, nestled confidently between a few other Czechoslovakian classics in the museum. I rather liked it. It has that Cold War chic that’s now swung firmly into the territory of retro-cool. The kind of car you’d drive ironically until you realised you’d accidentally grown fond of it. It doesn’t whisper luxury, it mutters durability and it doesn’t demand attention, it earns it. And unlike most modern cars, it could probably survive a mild nuclear event with only cosmetic damage…..